New(s)

I just want to write this to let all of our millions of fans know: Dodeckers are coming back!

After I graduated, the original Dodeckers and I split up. We now reside all over the country and can no longer get together to film anymore. However, I haven't let the YouTube channel die. I've been keeping it busy since then and it's even grown to have over 1000 subscribers!

Things are different now and it is time for us to go back to our roots. I have accumulated a team of people that love to make videos and we are going to begin anew. Expect word from us in the coming months because new content is coming.

Dodeckervision 2010

It's a new decade. Dodeckers are leading the way of innovation with a brand new video format: Dodeckervision. It's technical name is Super Ultra Omega High Definition Oblong Screen, but we like to call it Dodeckervision for short. You can check out the new video explaining some of the details.



The amazing part is (which really isn't amazing because it's completely what we expected to happen) that Dodeckervision has already started taking hold of the net. The great emperor Biggy D Man changed the entire landscape of his channel to promote the new evolution of video. TheDodeckers told the world that this thing would catch on, that this was the next best thing in video, and we were right. Of course we were!

What's next, you ask? Well, more Dodeckervision, that's for sure. Considering the immediate success of the format launch, there is no doubt that we will be uploading every new feature video in 100% Dodeckervision.

We stand atop our pedestal and gaze down upon the Dodeckernation as it grows. We glow as we look upon your smiling faces, staring up at as we produce the internet's finest content. There is no end in sight (despite the words of the past). We are the kings of YouTube and our ideals will spread throughout the souls of Donationals everywhere.

All who oppose us shall fall. Period.

Peace, love, and modesty,
-the greatest

an inkling

What is fun? In my opinion, fun is gaining power! That and destroying power. If you work really really hard to make something or become someone and you fail, then the next best thing is to destroy those that are better than you. It's the only enjoyable thing you are left with. That's how super villains are made. You aren't respected enough or you lost something you loved and can never get it back so you become bent on this idea that you must destroy all that IS respected and all continues to be true and just. I don't think that super villains do it in an attempt to gain power. I don't think any super villain things that they will actually win. I think they all do it for the sport of it all. How far can you make it before you are thwarted? But what else would a super villain do? Sit back and LET the good guys prevail? That's just boring.

The Dodeckers aren't trying to be super villains. They don't have to be. We are simply ourselves. A self-manifested, ego maniacal masterpiece that can't see itself becoming any better than it currently is. We are fine with who we are and could care less where we go, because frankly, we are as high up on the food chain as anyone can get. Simply put, TheDodeckers are the best channel on YouTube. But if you put all that YouTube stuff aside, the DodeckerNation is even stronger. Our foundations and our spirits are larger than any other ground up organization. We cannot be broken; cannot be toppled. We are untoppleable. Built dodecker strong.

Back on the topic of online video, today is all about making the avant garde. Everyone wants to make something that no one else has seen before (I shouldn't even really say "today" because that's how it's always been). If you think up something new, then you are special. This is why you see so much ridiculous and often times random shit coming out of every entertainment producing orifice on the planet. Most of the time it's all a tub of useless and laughless garbage, but every so often you get a gem that can actually cause a chuckle. Then, of course, you have the knee slapping sketches of the Dodeckers, however just because something is weird doesn't make it good. It sure helps, but you can't base a video's 'goodness' on how weird it is. That's just not how it works. It's got to have a soul.

Each video that is birthed from The Dodeckers is purebred. We usually rank our stuff according to Power Rangers quality. If the comedy can stand its ground against the best gags of a Rangers episode, then it's ready to hit the net. Otherwise, it need refinement (or a trip to the trash bin). But we don't condemn ourselves just to skits either. If we stumble across a funny, real life scenario, or some hilarious computer malfunction, we'll do our best to capture the essence of the laugh in an attempt to immortalize it in a video in which to share with the DodeckerNation.

Again, weirdness sucks. Get a life. Shits gotta have soul. Dodeckers are god. We can't be beat. Come out from the world and into my arms, like wind on the water we move. This be a wild mountain nation and the only things that will survive are god damn grizzly bears and the mother fucking Dodeckers!

Bitch, reality.

Reality

The problem with today's today is the lack of reality. All of these people on YouTube are talking about how awesome they are. People go gaga over some of the fags that show up on YouTube and by blabbering all over them, they make them this "big thing" when in reality they are just a stupid fagot.

Now, I know what you are thinking. "You're just jealous because you aren't as popular or as sexy as the YouTube celebrities." Well, you would partially be right, but that's not really the complete motive behind this rant. What my problem is, all of these people's minds are being warped by this ridiculous sense of talent. You can literally post any piece of garbage on YouTube and if you have the slightest shred of a fan base, you are going to get people bending over backwards, screaming from their rooftops of how awesome the stupid thing is. "OMG! You made a 3 second video of you lip syncing to 2 seconds of a Jonas Brothers song! OMG OMG OMG! 5 stars!"

When users receive all of this positive feedback, they get an instant ego boost and think that what they are doing is actually something really extraordinary. It's the same thing with people on reality TV shows. They think if they can do something "super cool" on TV, they are going to make a huge impact and be set for life because of some stupid stunt. But in reality, it's all nonsense. Just about every single video on YouTube completely blows ass. They all suck. Unless it's a rip of some TV show that's actually good; any other piece of user generated content is pure trash and I think it's high time people start realizing it.

One YouTube user said the other day that the people behind Saturday Night Live should recruit writers from YouTube for their skits because an "untapped resource". That's complete retardation! Everything on YouTube sucks so much ass, why the fuck would professional TV producers look to YouTube users for writing positions!? I'm not saying SNL is good either, because that show sucks as well. Regardless, these people online are riding this high horse that they really need to get the fuck off of.

What is worse is when YouTube users actually take advice from YouTube personalities on, let's say, movies to go see. Any stupid fuck can get big on YouTube and then start preaching just about anything they want and people will listen to them. If you are a partner, you can see a movie and say it sucks and you've single handedly stopped at least 100 devoted fans from going to see it. And it could have been a good movie too! The partner could have been (and most likely is) a complete idiot.

These actions are all mimicked in all kinds of places all around the world. It's not just online. It's on TV, in politics, in your own home. People are mindless, fucking idiots that are so powerfully ignorant that there is nothing anyone can do to stop them.

But we have to stop them. This generation, the one coming in right now, is the one that has to make it right. We have to start laying down the law on idiots and start making sense of our culture. We need to put the idiocracy aside and start spreading reality around the world. I don't want the children of tomorrow to grow up idolizing a bunch of fucking morons on YouTube who think they are the world's next best thing (or current best thing for that matter).

I want people to learn that every single person is capable of great things and aren't better than anyone else. People have to learn respect and how to comprehend when people are speaking truth and when they are just being retarded. We have to abolish a good chunk of political correctness and start to reintroduce food for thought. The old time, homely love that everyone use to have before all of this technological, pop-star, rigmarole began. And this rant is coming from a 20 year old!

Join the fight to slap reality back into people's world's. Stand along side the Dodeckers and bring this world back to a place that we can respect. Let's either try to replenish our dignity or else grow some more.

-dodecked

Dodecker Nation

Times are slow. This is true. But the Dodeckers are rising. Our powers are only growing stronger with time. Along with more and greater videos, our fan base is increasing to all reaches of the world! None of this is surprising though because the Dodeckers are the best freaking channel on the market. We are the single hottest commodity on the market!

If one had to describe the Dodeckers, you would have to consider us geniuses. Our comedy and our spirit stands so tall, that no one else can possibly get close to us without being overshadowed. We are simply the best. Our ideas as well as the way we film our scenes and the way we edit it all together is better than even the greatest Hollywood production. Simply put, if the Dodeckers wanted to break out of YouTube and become multi-trillionairs, we could do it without a problem.

Our charisma is another weapon we have in our arsenal. The persona we tote around has an aura about it that is so personal, so conceded, so inflamed that it glows with a sort of brilliance that no other human being possesses. Do you see any other glowing people walking around? I don't think so. The Dodeckers are IT! Some people say we are extraterrestrial; that our powers are so out of this world that we can't even possibly be Earth-born and what we say to that is, "who is to know?" Just because our abilities are so vast and amazing, and just because we glow different shades of calismock and berendigo doesn't mean we are aliens. Maybe it means that we are the rebirth of a fallen god. Maybe we are the Messiah! Possibly even Jesus Christ himself. Ever consider that? Of course you have.

Whatever our origins, beyond all explanations, the Dodeckers are just 'great'. We need no back story in order to be a phenomenon. We are just going to keep rolling with the glamor and affection that our minds use to saturate our souls with to the point where we don't even need to communicate with the rest of existence because WE ARE EXISTENCE! One does not meddle in the affairs of dragons the same as one does not meddle in the affairs of the Dodeckers. We are just too great for any other living being to comprehend. But what makes us even more extraordinary is that we invite the rest of the world to do just that. We open up our minds and our powers to the world! We have created a nation and anyone can be a part. Just comment on our channel or on this blog. Just say "I am a part of the Dodecker Nation!" Your words will be spoken with the power of the Almighty and they will be heard by all organisms no matter how big or how old. We are united. We are strength. We are embellishment. We are modesty.

Dodeckers for life! Modesty at its finest.

We are

We are the best. All of us. Us, the Dodeckers. You, the reader. We are all the best. If you are a fan of theDodeckers, you ARE a Dodecker; and it is that kind of power and purity that theDodeckers channel embodies. We are in it for the laughs. All of us.

TheDodeckers is the best channel on YouTube because we aren't in it for anything because we know that nothing really matters. We are who we are and we do what we want to and what we have to, and what we want and have to do is have a good time. We are strong mentally and spiritually. Out modesty comes in the form of self gratification. We are justice in a world of impurities. We choose not to fight because to fight is not right. To be is the way. And we are.

TheDodeckers is a movement. We embrace all and wish all to be a part. If you are down on yourself or you think that you will never be good enough; if you always look at others and see them as better than yourself; if you feel like you are empty and are searching for a hole to unpack the soul; the answer is here. TheDodeckers are a path to salvation. Stand up. Make your voice heard. "I am a Dodecker and nothing else matters."

Our power is only limited by one's imagination. Our call is deep rooted in to the souls of billions. They only have to come to the realization. We house the lost. We support the weak. We protect the small. And most of all, we put on a smile on the face of the sad and depressed.

In a world full of untruth and monotony; in a world full of blame and blind judgments; we stand united. We may be misunderstood, but we are together in that fact. We are a wall that can not be penetrated. We are a force that can not be subsided. We are, and forever will be, the strongest force on YouTube and the world.

yours truly,
Dodeckers forever

preparing to climb

The Dodeckers are mobilizing this weekend. All five of the current family plus close cousins. Thanks to the sly thinking of our lead Facial Hair Manager, The Dodeckers have gained access to a fantastic little studio. A green screen room the likes we've never seen! All the walls, the floor, professionally greened as well as lights upon lights of professional quality. When he time is right, the Dodeckers will make our way to this little save haven and then make some of the GREATEST GREEN SCREEN VIDEOS THE YOUTUBE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN! It will truly be the point where "shit gets real".

Did I mention we are climbing the Andys? No? Well, I just did. And there is also a mime involved. BEAT THAT!

Production on our next project will begin this Saturday. Production of our second project will begin shortly after that the very same afternoon. Production of another project will begin somewhere in between those two.

So be sure to scrub your scrims and faahs because The Dodeckers are CUMMIN!